Life With the Norman's: November 2017

Last week, we reached a big milestone in parenting. I no longer have 3 kids under 4 years old. I now have a 4 year old. Curtis, my first born, my rules follower, my justice child with a tender compassionate heart, is now 4. These years have flown by that I've been a mom for 4 years plus 9 months. He is such a fun kid. He loves to laugh, knows he's funny. He picks up on so much and says some of the most hilarious things, like all toddlers do. He's smart, although I'm sure I'm biased. He loves his brothers, helps take care of them, is learning to protect them, learning to love them and help keep them safe. He reminds Judah to have "walking feet" around the fireplace and rocks Jacob in his rocker when he starts to cry. He loves helping me with anything that he can. He loves his daddy probably more than anything else, loves to play with him, help him and learn from him. We do have hard days, he definitely is a 4 year old, learning to be his own person and trying to figure out who that is. I'm learning to embrace him for who he is, although some days, it can be very hard. I've learned to live in the loud, in the mess, in the chaos, in the movement. I'm trying to learn to let him be, not to dictate everything he does, but to allow him creativity, as long as he isn't hurting anyone or destroying my house. This part can be hard, because I definitely have my own way of doing things, but I'm learning that he does too, and that's ok. I'm so thankful for this little boy that God has blessed me with.

Also, last week, Jacob turned 3 months. Every month things are changing with him. I forgot how much that happens with newborns. Nothing ever stays the same. Once you have something figured out, something new comes along. I had actually allowed myself to get used to him sleeping through the night. I laugh when I think about that, thinking that was going to last. This past month, that has not happened. As I write this at almost 2000, I've been up since 0200 because he did not want to be put down. Every few nights, this is my norm. I think he's teething, or at least I'm telling myself that because I feel like I need a reason for my lack of sleep, but it could just be that he's a baby who wants to know his mama is near. I know that's normal, I know him wanting to nurse through the night is normal. And since he's probably my last, I'm trying to not wish these days away, although that part is hard. In the midst of my sleep deprivation, I'm learning to cry out to Jesus. I don't do it often enough. More often than not, I think I can do these days by myself and then I wind up frazzeled, getting upset at the boys for being boys/children, and/or crying because I just don't feel like I can do it anymore. Then I see Jacob's sweet face as he falls asleep nursing, or I see Curtis rocking him, or Judah laying down beside him and hugging him and remember that God gave me these boys to love and to teach and to train to be men of God, men who will change the world. And I have to remind myself of that job, and remind myself that I need Jesus daily, hourly or more if I am going to do that job well. It's a struggle, but I'm learning to struggle well. I'm thankful for these boys God has given me, thankful for his grace every day as I raise them and thankful for new mercies every morning to get a new start.

My silly Curtis, he had a lot of fun with pictures, but then said, "Ok, I'm done now".

The closest to a smile I could get, for some reason he doesn't want to smile for the camera yet

The boys wanted to keep him "warm and safe". This was when our AC was broken if you can see Curtis' sweaty head. He didn't need to be warmer, but it was cute.